satire and humor

Sanders Supporters Break Facebook

Shortly after the apocalyptic signs in the sky and what-not, Facebook went down. Again. Facebook officials claimed that it was due to “configuration issues,” but insiders admit it was the sheer weight of Bernie Sanders supporters that caused the problem.

By August 22 Bernie Sanders page had received 1,218,879 likes and the number continues to climb. Hillary Clinton had only received 1,205,437 and apparently more of hers came from Baghdad than any American city. [1] While President Obama has been accused of just about everything else, so far as I am aware, no one has as yet accused him of extending American voting rights to Iraq.

Apparently Clinton has over 18,150 followers in Myanmar. Myanmar is not a county in Alabama, by the way. It’s a country in Asia where either a great many people are interested in the American election process or where there are “click farms” where Facebook “likes” can be purchased.

By contrast, Senator Sanders share of foreign “likes” is much smaller and comes primarily from Western Europe which does have a vested interested in who becomes the next American president because, well, they are between the US and Russia and that’s becoming a thing again.

Sanders popularity on the internet has become a focal point of media coverage off the web. It is something the pundits haven’t quite understood. It crept up on them.

But there is no denying it. The Sandersforpresident subreddit has over 112,000 readers. There are Facebook pages for Sanders from towns, counties and states across the country.

photo by Gage Skidmore

photo by Gage Skidmore

Sanders supporters are everywhere.

After the second time Facebook went down, Mark Zukerberg was overheard muttering, “It’s those Sanders people. We’ve been vacuuming them out of the servers.”

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About Roger A. Shipley - The Willowbrook Curmudgeon

Roger Shipley, AKA The Willowbrook Curmudgeon, spent forty years teaching in the American educational system and emerged a grumpy old man. Ensconced in the Pacific Northwest, he writes, carves, and chides people for bad grammar. You can also find his grumblings at The Curmudgeon's Lair or follow his nonsense on Twitter or Face Book

23 Comments

  1. I thought FB went down because Koch Brothers were choking on too much truth. People are pissed. Please revisit JFK speech ‘The President and the Press.’
    I am glad Bernie’s supporters are growing, but that has to be making the duo poly and oligarchy nervous.

    • The oligarchy should be nervous.

      • Linda

        Darn right!!!!! 🙂

      • JohnOverstreet

        ^upvotes

    • caryn martin

      Good answer!

  2. Sarahjane

    I think I may be your twin from a different mother. I am trying to keep the east coast grammatically correct and appreciate your efforts on the west coast. There is little hope for the middle of the country unless there is third sibling neither of us has met.

    • Always glad to meet my twins. I taught English to a few hundred in the middle. Maybe one of them will take up the cause.

    • Joshua

      Hello, I’m the third sibling here from Denver. I’m hard at work as well but the battle over proper grammar wages on…

    • Timothy B. Smith

      Middle Michigan reporting for duty. If we’re not “triplet’s” from other mother’s we’re at least kindred spirits.

      • This is going to be fun. Who brought beer?

        • Gid

          I’m a 30+ year veteran of the Grammar Police, and while I don’t do beer, I make a very creditable martini.

      • Valerie

        Ack. Do not use an apostrophe in “triplet’s.” It’s plural, not possessive; hence, “triplets.” Just because a word ends in s, doesn’t mean it needs an apostrophe!

        • Ok. I think it may be time to bring the whole grammar warden conversation to a conclusion. It’s been fun, and I enjoy the camaraderie, but we’re here to support Bernie. Let’s concentrate on that for a bit.

    • Robin Choudhury

      That would be me, here in Springfield MO lol

  3. Glenn Douglas harding 2nd

    3%er….constitutionalist.

  4. Yvette Jessen

    I am one of the people who like Bernie Sanders in Europe, but not for the reasons the article stated. While I do take an interest in US politics for the reasons stated, I am also a US citizen who plans to vote for him.

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  8. gretchen young

    The woman that raised me was an English professor. I was her pet grammar project as a child. When I learned to speak it was in my native language of Hoosier. I was adopted out of the foster system into an even more confusing world of correct speak, proper enunciation and NO slang. Whew. I’m long since out of that world but the grammar lessons did their job, mostly, and now I find myself mentally correcting just about everyone.

    • Amber

      I’m a New Englander from Massachusetts, now a New Mexico resident of 50 years. My Bostonian born and bred mother was adamant that my sister and I spoke “the King’s English” (this was while Elizabeth’s father, King George, was still alive). It was second nature for her to correct our grammar, for which I’m deeply grateful, to this day.

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